Bitterness

yeah, I'm entering a pretty bitter period in my life-- it starts with work, and I'm able to contain it there, but then it starts to spread to the rest of my life. I've never been able to figure out the cause, as I'm pretty good at keeping my work life and my personal life seperate-- there's some over lap with people I interact with which I also interact with at work.

I know that part of it is that I've got people who say that they're my friends, but I never actually hang out with them. Those aren't friends, those are people I know. They tell me that they're busy-- but no one's busy 24/7. I'm tired of getting the short end of the stick, and its getting to the point where I begin cutting off the people in my life who take but never give. I can only give so much before I need to be refilled. It isn't fair to the people with whom I have an equal give and take relationship, because it will begin to affect how I treat them as well.

It's too hot

I've been without my air conditioning for a while, but I didn't really start to feel it until this past saturday. My fan just isn't doing the job. So I've put in to have the air conditioning fixed, as well as the toilet which has been running constantly for the last few months. Its not that I like my things to work less than pefectly well, its just that I learn to adapt to the changes, and then forget about it completely.

It's for this reason that I abdicate spanking. When my parents spanked me, there wasn't a re-occurance of the crime committed for quite some time. But when I was grounded, or had things taken away, I learned to live without television or video games. I loved reading when I was little, and I still do, my parents never took my books away, so I always had a way to pass the time. But spankings, those hurt, and that nice survival instinct given to us by God teaches us that such pain is bad, and therefore, avoid things that cause it.