How Much of a Geek are you?

The Deviant Geek You answered 83% of the questions as a geek truly would.

You're a geek and you know it. You've got all sorts of fringe hobbies and socially unacceptable tendencies. Chances are, whenever possible, you hate to be grouped with other people and sometimes go out of your way just to be different. You're smart too. You're more willing to depend on your own brainpower to solve problems, instead of relying on others to pull you through life. You probably read a lot, and generally enjoy learning new things. So what's it all mean? You may be considered by some to be uncool, but you probably don't care either. In social situations you may be either slightly passive or slightly loud (geeks always fall into the extremes). In a nutshell, you answered enough questions correctly supporting a geek philosophy to be considered a more potent geek than 60% of the population.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 86% on geekness

Link: The True Geek Test written by ambientred on Ok Cupid

Deloria Screen Shots

Screenshots of deloria, designed to give free advertisements for the game.

They Made One For Guys Too

In response to Sissy's He-mote, I went and found this: The She-mote.



Later editions will include settings for type of sexual encounter, changing the hair color, as well as picture in picture, for when you just can't miss the game . . .

Well since we're taking tests here

I thought this one was funny:

I am 70% Promiscuous.

I like sex and have a healthy sex life. I get just enough and know how to use my sexuality. Some people might have a problem, but that is their problem not mine. They just need to get more.

Take the
Promiscuous Test
@ FualiDotCom

And I have no idea how I got this result:

I am 26% Hippie.

I need to step away from the tie-dye. I smell too good to be a hippie and my dad is probably a cop. Being a hippie is not a fashion craze, man. It was a way of life, in the 60’s, man.

Take the
Hippie Test
@ FualiDotCom

I guess being 26% hippy makes up for not being 100% promiscuous, although there's still the 4% unknown. Guess we'll never know what that 4% really is.

My blogfather's more of a hippie than me

So Harvey did this a while back, and true to form, I've been setting the bad example by not checking out blogs like I'm supposed to, I've been busy and lazy all at the same time. I've begun playing raquetball, which is more fun than I thought it'd be.

I am 9% Hippie.

What? Am I a Republican? Why did I even bother taken this test?! I guess I’ll back to my George W. Bush fan club and tell them I just wasted 10 minutes of my life. At least I don’t stink, man.

Take the
Hippie Test
@ FualiDotCom

Lt. gov. crashed Marine's funeral, kin say

Taken from: post-gazette


Saturday, July 23, 2005

By Tom Barnes, Post-Gazette Harrisburg Bureau



The family of a Marine who was killed in Iraq is furious with Lt. Gov. Catherine Baker Knoll for showing up uninvited at his funeral this week, handing out her business card and then saying "our government" is against the war.

Excuse me? Where does she get off saying that load of crap? I'm pretty sure it was our government that sent our troops to war in the first place.

Catherine Baker Knoll
Rhonda Goodrich of Indiana, Pa., said yesterday that a funeral was held Tuesday at a church in Carnegie for her brother-in-law, Staff Sgt. Joseph Goodrich, 32.

She said he "died bravely and courageously in Iraq on July 10, serving his country."

In a phone interview, Goodrich said the funeral service was packed with people "who wanted to tell his family how Joe had impacted their lives."

Then, suddenly, "one uninvited guest made an appearance, Catherine Baker Knoll."

She sat down next to a Goodrich family member and, during the distribution of communion, said, "Who are you?" Then she handed the family member one of her business cards, which Goodrich said she still has.

Okay, not only does she show up uninvited, but then she starts campaigning? I've had some idiots come through my checkout line, but this lady makes them seem intelligent by comparison.

"Knoll felt this was an appropriate time to campaign and impose her will on us," Goodrich said. "I am amazed and disgusted Knoll finds a Marine funeral a prime place to campaign."

Goodrich said she is positive that Knoll was not invited to the funeral, which was jammed with Marines in dress uniform and police officers, because the fallen Marine had been a policeman in McKeesport and Indiana County.

"Our family deserves an apology," Rhonda Goodrich said. "Here you have a soldier who was killed -- dying for his country -- in a church full of grieving family members and she shows up uninvited. It made a mockery of Joey's death."

What really upset the family, Goodrich said, is that Knoll said, 'I want you to know our government is against this war,' " Goodrich said.

She said she is going to seek an answer from Gov. Ed Rendell's administration if it opposes the fighting in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Knoll was traveling yesterday, away from the Capitol, and couldn't be reached. But an aide said she "extends condolences to all families who have lost loved ones" serving in the military.

"Extends condolences," indeed. By allowing this woman to do what she's doing, that statement means about as much as washing a friends car for them during a monsoon.

Without having talked to her, the aide, who asked not to be named, said, "The family members of fallen soldiers are in our hearts and prayers. Our prayers go out to their loved ones in their hour of grief."

Asked to comment on Goodrich's complaints about Knoll's conduct at the funeral, the aide said that "would be inappropriate."

That would be "inappropriate?" What about going to a funeral full of men and women, and families of those men and women, who have served our country, fought for our freedom, and then telling them that their government didn't support the war? That's a very demoralizing statement, it implies that the government doesn't support our troops.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(Harrisburg Bureau Chief Tom Barnes can be reached at tbarnes@post-gazette.com or 717-787-4254.)

Warning for Men

I Can't Help Being Irresistable . . .

Despite everything I try, people can't help but fall in love with me. I'm not sure if its my stunning good looks, my sexy voice, or my personality (Just ask R.R.) but its getting really tiring . . .

Making the work day go by just a little faster

okay, so your at work, browsing through blogs that haven't updated in the five minutes since your last viewing. There is a solution for this.

Try out the Evil Cube, your work day will pass just a little faster with it.

The Buffalo Theory

I've seen this a few times thoughout my net exploration, and decided that it was time to share it with others.


A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is being hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.

In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first.

In this way, regular consumption of alcohol eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few shots and a couple of beers.

Dating 101- pt. 2

A lot of guys seem to think that attraction is when one person wants what another person has. Some think of attraction as the result of being good-looking or otherwise "attractive". In fact a lotof people confuse attraction with "attractive". When I think of the concept of attraction, I think
of it primarily as an emotion. It seems to me that it's more a combination of powerful emotions that come together to form a very, very special new SUPER-emotion.


It's homework time.

1) Write down all of the things that should work
when it comes to making women feel attracted to
you. This might include buying gifts and food,
giving constant compliments, and acting "nice".

2) Write down your own personal experience of what
actually happens when you do these "socially
correct things that mom taught you" with women.

3) Pretend for a moment that everything you've
been taught about women is wrong. Further, pretend
that women are actually wired in reverse. If this
were true, what kinds of things would result in a
woman feeling attraction for a man?

Marine Corps Shortens Slogan To 'The Few'

Just for the record, it's all his fault:

WASHINGTON, DC—In light of recruiting shortfalls, a near standstill in re-enlistment, and rock-bottom troop morale, U.S. Marine Corps Commandant Gen. Michael Hagee announced Monday that the Marines will alter their unofficial slogan, abbreviating it to the more accurate "The Few." Hagee said, "We are still the Marines, the premier combat arm of the U.S. military." The Marines will also change their motto to Semper Fidelis, Sic Non Sapienti, or "Always Faithful, But This Is Just Ridiculous."

From the Onion,
Lord Salens

The Many Faces of Me

starts with the oldest, and procedes to my current style, that with a fu manchu.

Michigan Laws

Unless it states that it was repealed, these laws are still in effect in Michigan.

A woman isn't allowed to cut her own hair without her husband's permission.

There is a 3 cent bounty for each starling and 10 cent bounty for each crow killed in any village, township, or city in the state.

It is legal for a robber to file a law suit, if he or she got hurt in your house.

You may not swear in front of women and children. (Repealed)

Any person over the age of 12 may have a license for a handgun as long as he/she has not been convicted of a felony.

It is illegal to kill a dog using a decompression chamber.

Adultery is illegal, but can only be punished upon a complaint by the affected husband or wife. Furthermore, no prosecution may take place if the offense was committed over a year from when a complaint was made.

No man may seduce and corrupt an unmarried girl, or else he risks five years in prison.

Cars may not be sold on Sunday.


Detroit Laws

Couples are banned from making love in an automobile unless the act takes place while the vehicle is parked on the couple's own property.

Willfully destroying your old radio is prohibited.

It is illegal for a man to scowl at his wife on Sunday.

It is illegal to let your pig run free in Detroit unless it has a ring in its nose. According to history and animal husbandry, it prevents them from "rooting" in the ground for their food.

Security guards at Joe Louis Arena will confiscate any item they feel might be thrown onto the ice. Furthermore, any person seen throwing an octopus onto the ice at a Red Wings game will be taken to jail.


Putt-putt golf courses must close by 1:00 AM.
Get the full text of this law.

Apparently the good folks in Detroit did not quite know what ‘new’ meant. The city took it upon themselves to state that ‘new’ bedding must be of all new material.

Grand Haven Laws
No person shall throw an abandoned hoop skirt into any street or on any sidewalk, under penalty of a five- dollar fine for each offense.

Harper Woods Laws
It is illegal to paint sparrows to sell them as parakeets.

Kalamazoo Laws
It is against the law to serenade your girlfriend.

Rochester Laws
All bathing suits must have been inspected by the head of police.

Soo Laws
Smoking while in bed is illegal.

Wayland Laws
Anyone can keep their cow on Main Street downtown at a cost of 3 cents per day.

Stupid Criminal of the day

John Schieman, 37, thought the best time to steal a car would be when its owner was getting out. As his would-be-victim, Robin Van Bortle, 32, was attaching The Club, to her steering wheel, Schieman made his move. Startled, the astute woman reacting by beating Schieman over the head with the antitheft device. The budding criminal was charged with robbery, assault, and grand larceny.

Harry Potter 6

I finished reading Harry Potter 6. Its a good book, I really enjoyed it. My favorite charactor dies in this one, and Harry finally finds love. Ron finally snogs a girl, and Hermionee is as brainy as ever, though is shown up by another classmate in one of her classes. We find out how it is that Voldemort has been able to survive, and are once again reminded what the most powerful magic is. We learn what it feels like to aparate, and find out more about Snape. Once again, they need a new Defense Against The Dark Arts teacher. And it was unexpected as to who the Half-Blood Prince is.

If you haven't started this series yet, you really should do so. It is one of the finer book series that I've read.

Interesting Note

Today was the release date for Harry Potter 6. I'm anxiously awaiting my copy to come in the mail, it should arrive today or tomorrow. I do find it interesting to note that this book was in the best seller's list months before it actually came out. Part of me will laugh if this latest book turns out to be completely horrible. The other parts will cry tears of great sadness if that's the case.

In other news

I don't know if I have a high tolerance now, but last night after having a two shots of whiskey, a shot of rum, and a jack and coke, I barely had a buzz for ten minutes. There's no way I had enough to drink so that I was pushed back into sober again, so I'm not sure what the deal was. Anyone have a clue as to what my problem is? Maybe I shouldn't drink for a while.

Today's Stupid Criminal

While most young people his age are pursuing higher education or making other plans to advance their careers, a 22 year-old Santa Cruz California genius was planning to vandalize a local store. According to his carefully crafted plan, the man would splash some green paint on the front doors of The Gap on Pacific Avenue and then make a clean getaway. It was a pretty good plan, as ignorant schemes go, but for one problem. The man was caught after trailing green paint from Pacific Avenue to his home on Mission Street.

Now our young rocket scientist must pay the city's clean-up costs, estimated to be $1,000, pay a $500 fine, serve 200 hours of community service and stay away from downtown.

Application to date your daughter

Sissy has posted an application so that her father might judge who is fit to date her.


APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER

NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless
accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage,
and current medical report from your doctor.

Note: I was adopted, so have no idea what my lineage is, only some clues as to what it isn't. From appearances, there is no african-american, middle-eastern, or asian heritage in my lineage.

NAME: Andrew (Aris Ravencroft) DATE OF BIRTH: 830423

HEIGHT: 5‘8” WEIGHT: 200 IQ: 125 GPA: 3.0

SOCIAL SECURITY #: I am not posting that online

DRIVERS LICENSE: see social security

BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES: N/A

HOME ADDRESS: See D.L. CITY/STATE: Grand Rapids ZIP: 49525

Do you have parents? Yes
Is one male and the other female? Yes
If No, explain:
______________________________________________________________

Number of years they have been married: 15-16

If less than your age, explain
Mother adopted me while she was single, and married my father when I turned 7, he in turn adopted me when I turned 12.

ACCESSORIES SECTION:

A. Do you own or have access to a van? No

B. A truck with oversized tires? No

C. A waterbed? No

D. A pickup with a mattress in the back? No

E. A tattoo? No

F. Do you have an earring: Used to, still have the hole.


(IF YOU ANSWERED "YES" TO ANY OF THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION
AND LEAVE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY. I SUGGEST RUNNING.)


ESSAY SECTION:

In 50 words or less, what does "LATE" mean to you?

I am never late, I hate being late, and I hate when other people are late, in a way, it‘s breaking your word to the person you told you‘d be there at X time.

In 50 words or less, what does "DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER" mean to you?

It means I‘m not going to touch your daughter in any way that would be dishonorable to her.

In 50 words or less, what does "ABSTINENCE" mean to you?

No sex until marriage, which is fine with me.


REFERENCES SECTION:

Church you attend: Currently searching for a new church

How often you attend: more than once a week

When would be the best time to interview your:

father? Evening before ten

mother? Evening before ten

pastor? During the day


SHORT-ANSWER SECTION:

Answer by filling in the blank. Please answer freely, all answers
are confidential.

A: If I were shot, the last place I would want shot would be:

Any vital area

B: If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my:

Neck

C: A woman's place is in the:

If married, then the home, raising kids, of which I would help as is part of my job as a father

D: The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is:

Ask me anything, I have nothing to hide.

E. What do you want to do IF you grow up? Law Enforcement

F. When I meet a girl, the thing I always notice about her first is:

Eyes and/or voice, depending on if I see her first, or hear her first.

F. What is the current going rate of a hotel room? No clue.

I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE WATER TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS, AND HILLARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE.


Andrew (Aris Ravencroft)
Applicant's Signature (that means sign your name, moron!)


Andrew‘s Southern Belle Momma -- Andrew’s Former Navy Father
Mother's Signature Father's Signature

Paster Bill -- George Walker Bush
Pastor/Priest/Rabbi State Representative/Congressman

Thank you for your interest, and it had better be genuine and
non-sexual. Please allow four to six years for processing.

You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do
not try to call or write (since you probably can't, and it would
cause you injury). If your application is rejected, you will be
notified by two gentleman wearing white ties carrying violin cases.
(you might watch your back)

To prepare yourself, start studying Daddy's Rules for Dating. (coming soon)

United States Marine Corps

Mr Boynkin,

This is to inform you that effective 9 July 2005, you are released, and no longer have any contractual affiliations or obligations to any component of the United States Marine Corps. You are hereby seperated with the following discharge code: ZBD Refused to enlist-separation

The description of your discharge is "entry-level separation." Members of this status do not receive a discharge certificate or characterization of service at seperation.

If you eliminate your disqualification and desire to re-enter the United States Marine Corps, present this letter to the Commanding Officer of the nearest Marine Corps Recruiting Station.

Respectfully,

R.W. W.
Commanding Officer

Copy to:

RS LAN

Fun With Mormons Pt. 1

Another thing you all may not know about me, since we know each other so very little, is that I have a strange fascination with religions. Now it mostly pertains to Occult type religions, as what is 'hidden', as the name applies, is quite interesting to me. Not that these religions have anything deeply spiritual to offer per se, nor do I follow the tenants of any religion except maybe the one dedicated to myself as Deity.

For the most part I have steered away from any Christian sects. It's not that I have a serious disliking for any of them, it's just that whenever I meet someone from one of those religions (such as the Mormons or Jehovah's Witnesses) they always seem so hellbent on converting me. Besides that I spent 9 years in Catholic school, with daily mass and lessons. Apparently though I missed all the good tidbits of information that would so entertain me in the last few years.

Take for instance the JWs. Did you know that windchimes are evil, as the Devil speaks through them? Or perhaps the Mormons who believe that the Native Americans came over to America on a wooden submarine that was 'tight unto like a dish'. Plus there's the shiney brass compass that god left for his followers one night to find their way.

Now the Mormons have been especially good to me. So far I've recieved a Book of Mormom, a King James Bible, some pamphlets, and a great 'Walking with Jesus' DVD. All this obtained from the comfort of my computer chair. It's unfortunate that to get the better material, I'll need to have them come by and try to convert me to their way. But there is the chance of obtaining more goodies such as their 'Pearl of Great Price', and 'the Doctrine and Covenants'. One of said books is supposedly quite fringe even for the Mormons from what I'm told.

To Be Continued,
Lord Salens

For all you Lord Salens Fans............

In response to Ravencroft's post, I'm not gone just lazy. You should see my own site... few and far between posts. For those who may not know me, here's a little insight into the Mind of Lord Salens:
I once thought it would be cool to design websites for a living and made some decent money, but what held me back was the fact that if it wasn't fun I didn't want to get back to it. It seems that something that so entertained me when I was screwing around, was just not so interesting when I was expected to me deadlines and such. Not that it wasn't an excellent creative outlet, it just wasn't enough of an outlet to keep me going.

That's the main reason I have my own domain and just randomly post things there. It's not likely to draw much attention and I can do it at my own pace.

But worry not for I am working on a new post that came to me while standing on my back deck... Fun With Mormons. Hopefully you'll be delighted.

In Nomine Salens,
Lord Salens

For all you Harry Potter Fans............

I happened across this site and since I haven't made an appearance in while, figured I'd post it. For any of you that enjoy Harry Potter and particularly get a laugh from reading the "hate mail" of stupid people, check out the "Wall of Shame". Located on the left hand side of the site, under the heading "MuggleNet".
I still must confess to being more of a Lord of the Rings fan than Potter fan, but I do however enjoy a good read and movie. Both of which I've found in the Potter series. Since I found a few of them so funny, I'll also include just a smattering of what you can expect at the Wall of Shame.
Enjoy...........or not.............:)

http://www.mugglenet.com/

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A note from Wall of Shame founder and caretaker (or more appropriately, "crap-taker" ... you'll see), Emerson:

This is a collection of the dumbest, random and most pointless letters we've received. Most of them were, for reasons unknown, addressed to me, so I am the one responsible for this excuse for a page. You'll have lost several IQ points by the time you finish this, but at least you'll feel smarter!

jkr saidt he title to book7 on her website.. harry potter and the mystic kettle of nackledirk!!!!!

-Submitted by an alarming amount of people.

Sar´casm n. 1. a form of wit that is marked by the use of sarcastic language and is intended to make its victim the butt of contempt or ridicule

Yeah, she was kidding...!

It costs money but for a good enough software for Mugglenet Interactive would be AOL Highspeed. The connections very fast and reilaible it gives avaible software to use.

If you laughed when you read this, you're a geek like me. If you laughed really hard when you read this, you also have a strange sense of humor.

To Mr. Dude,
I find it not very nice that you make fun of the no believers on a web page. It would be a lot nicer if you had them in something like the quote thingy that's on every page of Muggle Net. Also, why did the Navy do your layout? I requested they do one for me and they never replied.
Jenna-Jane.<> If you look at the bottom of this page, you'll see it says the layout was created by Navy. Navy is a person. She lives in Australia.

Frankly, I'm a little scared you actually asked the United States Navy to make you a website layout.

(For the record, I have no earthly idea what she's talking about in the first part of the email.

Dating 101

I promised this this weekend, but like I said, I was busy.

When my plans were to go into bootcamp, I decided to take a break from dating, now that I'm back, I've decided to start again. Anyway, I figured it would be a good idea to review what I know, and the easiest way for me to review, is to write it down. So guys, I've decided to share this information with you as well.

Attraction isn’t a choice. If you talk with a girl, and she forms an opinion of you, and she isn’t attracted to you, then there is nothing you can do about it. However, if she does feel attraction towards you, then there’s nothing she can do about it. No amount of logic, talking to her friends, peer pressure, can over come it. The more it grows, the more powerful it becomes, it will overrule everything, to the point where the girl will make sacrifices to be with that guy, even if he isn‘t the best for them, even in situations where the guy is abusive. So how do you form attraction?

The key, is to be confident and funny. You have to be able to keep your power in a relationship. Too often, I’ve seen guys give up their power even before a relationship starts. They’ll see an attractive girl, and immediately ask, “would she be interested in me?” This is the kind of question wussies ask. What is a wussy? A wussy is the combination of two words, wimp, and another word which I won’t mention. Having wussyness is kryptonite for a guys chance to have a girl become attracted to him. The key therefore, is to remain confident, and to be funny. The ladies magazines that say that humor is one of the most attractive things about a guy weren’t lying, they merely left out that the guy also needs to be confident.

Things like, paying for dinner, for the movie, buying expensive gifts, all of these things are things a wussy would do. Now, if done the right way, they won’t hurt you. I typically act like its no big deal, however, I’ve also let her pay for my meal as well. “But that isn’t the gentlemanly thing to do.” Well, actually, I’m not sure it isn’t. The concept of a gentleman today isn’t a true gentleman, it’s a gentleman with his balls cut off. If you want a good example of a gentleman, look at the character of James Bond, or John Wayne. Study how they act around women. This is the type of confidence you want to have. Rhet Butler is another fine example of a true gentleman. Guys, its okay to watch Gone With The Wind with your girl, just make sure you’re studying Rhet whenever he’s in the scene.

A way that makes it easier to talk to a woman your interested in, is instead of asking, am I someone she would consider dating, ask this, “Is she someone I would consider dating?” I know it seems simple, but dating is in some aspects like a war, and if you have no moral, it’s impossible to get the victory.

Well class, this is enough for now, practice what you have learned thus far, and I’ll have another lesson for you in the future.

Today's Stupid Criminial

After a laborious two-week criminal trial in a very high profile bank robbery case, the jury finally ended its 14 hours of deliberations and entered the courtroom to deliver its verdict to the judge. The judge turns to the jury foreman and asks, "Has the jury reached a verdict in this case?"

"Yes, your honor," the foreman responded, "We find the defendant NOT GUILTY of all four counts of bank robbery,"

The family and friends of the defendant jump for joy at the sound of the "not guilty" verdict and hug each other as they shout expressions of divine gratitude. The defendant's attorney turns to his client and asks, "So, what do you think about that?"

The defendant looks around the courtroom slowly with a bewildered look on his face and then turns to his defense attorney and says, "I'm real confused here. Does this mean that I have to give all the money back?"

about that update I promised.

okay, I really am working on that post I promised. No I didn't procrastinate the entire weekend. I had to work-- I finally got a job. Its back at Meijer, which really sucks, but hey, its some income until I find a better job. Anyone hiring?

oh, and R.R. and Lord Salens, where have you disapeared to? Just cause I'm not going into the marine's anymore doesn't mean I want you to leave.

Today's Stupid Criminal

Dennis Newton was on trial for the armed robbery of a convenience store when he decided to fire his attorney. Oklahoma City District Attorney said Newton was doing a decent job until the store manage testified that Newton was indeed the robber. Newton jumped up, accused the woman of lying and then said, “I should have blown your f***ing head off” The defendant paused then added “If I had been the one that was there.” The jury deliberated for twenty minutes before returning a verdict of guilty and recommended a sentence of thirty years.

up and coming post

I'm working on an amazingly good post for you, it should be very helpful to most of my readers, it should be up later this weekend.

Today's Stupid Criminal

Charged with drug-possession, Christopher Johns claimed that he had been searched without a warrant. The prosecutor said the officer did not need a warrant because a bulge in Johns’s jacket could have been a gun. “Nonsense,” said Christopher who happened to be wearing the same jacket that day. When he handed the judge the jacket, a bag of cocaine fell out. The judge required a five minute recess so that he could regain his composure.

illusion

stare at the with relaxed eyes for about 1-2 minutes. then look at a picture of something, or at a white wall. It's trippy. (you'll need to click on it first)

Today's Stupid Criminal

Two Florida brothers convinced a dentist in to letting them chop off his finger. They would claim it was an accident and the three would split the insurance money. The dentist at first agreed, but quickly changed his mind. The brothers became infuriated, held the dentist down and forcibly cut his index finger off. The dentist could no longer practice and collected over one million dollars. When the brothers tried to extort money from the dentist, he reported them to the FBI. They were promptly arrested.

Fun With Kissing

okay, so, one of my favorite things to do with a girl, besides hang out, have fun, relax around, and have meaningful conversations with, is kissing. Ever since I was six when I first kissed a girl that wasn't my mom on the lips, I have enjoyed kissing. Obviously when I was younger, it wasn't anything like the kisses I'm going to share ina second, I had to grow into it, I had to add to my list of ways you can kiss. I've come up with a few, and if I leave any out, or have missed a rather fun way that you enjoy, be sure to add to the list in the comments.

Chocolate Kiss
Best done with a Mars Bar because there is caramel in that too! Just take a bite and French kiss as you would. Very silky smooth type of kiss, and can end up very messy. Extremely pleasurable, and even more funny! Perfect for a first date just after a first kiss, or something to do that's a little bit different. A must for anyone, best style of kissing ever!

Marco Polo Kiss
First one of you need to figure out who's marco and who's polo. Then you play the game like marco and polo. Except instead of just touching them, you have to embrace them in your arms and kiss him/her. It's great fun.

Tease Kiss
After you've started kissing, and are both involved, pull back, and do not put your tongue in your partner's mouth or touch their tongue with yours -- instead, lightly touch different parts of his/her lips with your tongue, and kiss them with light, gentle kisses. Even pull your head back from the comfortable forward angle, and see how long your partner can handle the tease before pulling you close for some really passionate kissing.

Peppermint Flavor Kiss
Peppermint Flavored Listerine is a powerful mouthwash, and about an hour after mouth washing with it, it makes the entire inside of your mouth really sweet and peppermint-flavored. This is a surprising and fun kissing experience (especially if he/she's not expecting the flavor). Both can enjoy it as your partner tries to find all the spots where the mouthwash left its flavor behind with his/her tongue. It may also work with other mouthwashes, but it works especially well with Listerine because its flavor is SO strong.

Malteser Kiss
One person pops a malteser in their mouth, and whilst
kissing, passes it to the other person on the tongue. The receiver keeps it in their mouth for a few seconds, just enough to lick a little chocolate off, before passing at back to their partner in the same way. This continues until there is no chocolate left on the Malteser, and then it must be swallowed by the one who receives it chocolate-less.

Breath of Life Kiss
In ancient Egypt, legend went that the god of the earth, Osiris was tricked by his brother, Set. In an arrangement for his brother, Set nailed the coffin shut and sent it down the Nile River. Isis, which was Osiris's loving wife, grieved for him and roamed the banks of the Nile. When she found his body, she breathed life back into him through her mouth. This kiss is preformed by first taking a deep breath. Have your partner kiss you slowly (preferably French), then have him or her suck out the breath in your mouth by inhaling deeply. To finish it, have him or her exhale, thus, the breath of life.

Spark Kiss
Get you and your partner to rub your socks on the carpet for about 30 seconds. Turn the lights off, and very slowly approach for a kiss. You will pass a static charge from one to the other, which can be quite fun, especially if through the tongue.

Bubble Gum Kiss
Place a piece of flavored bubble-gum in your mouth before kissing. While kissing, take turns trying to blow bubbles in each other's mouths. Challenging, but totally worth it!

Whisper Kiss
It's where you go up to your "Honey" and whisper to them (just like, talking and stuff) and your lips brush against theirs from time to time teasing them, and when you finally do kiss, it will be intense.

Suck Kissing
This can be a very seductive type of kiss. Instead of French Kissing with your mouth open, while your partner's lips are parted suck on their top our bottom lip with your own, just for a second or two. Then go back to another type of kiss or try the other lip.

Nip Kissing
This type of kiss has to be done carefully, but when done correctly can create a wonderful effect on your partner. While suck kissing, gently bite their lip, but be VERY gentle so as not to hurt your partner. This kiss should only be done with someone that you've kissed a few times before, otherwise you may shock your partner.

Surprise Kissing
This type of kiss is done when your partner is lying down on a sofa or the ground, either asleep or just lying with their eyes closed. Quietly approach your partner and place a small, very gentle kiss on their lips. Intensify the kiss until your partner opens their eyes or awakens.

Vacuum Kissing
This is a playful kiss. While in an open-mouthed kiss, suck in deeply so you're sucking the air from your partner.

Cordial Kissing
Take a sip of your favorite drink, either alcohol or something sweet, and then when your lips meet pour the drink in your partner's mouth. Only take a very small sip.

Butterfly Kissing
Put your eye really close to your partner's cheek and flutter your lashes upon their skin. You can also do this on their lips.

Melt Kissing
Pass an ice cube back and forth in mouth while French kissing.

Marathon Kissing
See how long you can kiss for (try 5 - 10 minutes straight)

Glow stick Frenzy
Pass the mini mouth glow stick back and forth (same thing as melt kissing).

Tongue Sucking
When you have the chance to get really deep into your partners mouth, suck on their tongue as far as you can. Don't suck to hard, you don't want to hurt your partner. Otherwise it's very pleasing!

Candy Kiss
Use either a Jolly Rancher or some type of hard candy/mint. Either you or your partner place the candy in your/their mouth and then it is like a game of keep away. Whoever starts tries to keep the candy in their mouth while the other person tries to get it in theirs. But you can only use your tongue and lips. This can be very fun if you have the right partner!!! Enjoy.

Sigh Kiss
When you first start kissing your partner gently lick their lips with the tip of your tongue. Then blow or sigh into their lips, causing a tingling feeling that will intensify your kiss for sure.

The Tickle Kiss
In this kiss you make use of the fact that the roof of the mouth is the most ticklish part of the body. Begin a normal French kiss and (be sure your partner understands the game) stroke your tongue across the roof of each other's mouth. This will create almost unbearable chills down your spine and the winner is the person who can stand them because the loser pulls away. The best part about this kiss is that it is different every time and always fun.

Name Kiss
If u have run out of things to do with your tongue spell your name. This works very well and everyone likes
it!
Tongue Wars
Each person tries to get their tongue in the other persons mouth while they try to get their tongue in your mouth. Each person "blocks" the other persons tongue with theirs. The winner gets to pick the next type of kiss. This game is great for reliving first make-out tension.

Starburst Trick
Out a starburst in your mouth, and while French kissing try to unwrap it! Enjoy!

Pop Kiss
Use pop-rocks, great fun. You've heard of fireworks, this is an explosion!

Ring Kiss
What you do is take a ring off your finger and put it on your tongue. Then while you and your partner are French kissing, he tries to slip it on the tip of his tongue! It is a lot of fun!

Tongue Tease
When you're French kissing, if/when you pull back, and before your mouths meet again, you can flick your tongue up and down quickly against the other person who is doing the same. It's very teasing and fun to see how long it lasts. Its hard to resist going strong after a while of flicking.

Touch Kiss
You do this after you and your partner have Frenched or really kissed a lot. What you do is just simply touch tongues - like the tip of your tongue. You may want to move it around but you don't have to. You don't do it inside your mouth you do it out in the open.

Underwater Kiss
Have your partner hold their breath underwater and when he or she taps you give them air.

Moving Kiss
Make sure a bed or couch or chair is behind your partner and when French kissing gently push your partner onto the chair or whatever is behind them. Very good for serious couples or just beginners.

Flavor Kissing
Put a piece of long lasting gum in your mouth (Hubba Bubba, Trident) just before you and your partner French kiss. While kissing pass the gum back and forth, and see how long it takes for the flavor to run out!

Chin Kiss
Hold your partner's chin with your middle, index, and thumb and tilt their head in the right direction. Continue to hold it as you kiss.

Lip Venom
Before you go to kiss your partner, apply lip venom to your lips when he isn't looking. Lip venom is a safe cosmetic item that you can buy at Scarlets and other cosmetic stores and what it does is it draws the blood to your lips, making them red and tingly. A little bit goes a very long way and can still be passed up until probably about a half an hour after applying. When your partner kisses you, he will have this sensual feeling running through his lips for the rest of the day.

Pepper Kiss
Take a hot pepper and roll it on your lips then kiss your partner. It gives the kiss a kick. (Note use peppers as hot as you or your partner can take, but not too hot or it will just burn and ruin the kiss.)

Chew Kiss
Tell your partner to place their tongue deeply into mouth deeply... you VERY GENTLY "chew" on the back part of their tongue... do not suck. This will create a sensation in other places that can be very exciting!

Breath Kiss
In a hot moment - creates major anticipation - barely touch lips with lips slightly parted... then breath your partner's breath... moving heads slowly to experience different sensations... lips touching on and off slightly... it is a very teasing sort of kiss and builds passion tremendously.

Tongue Ring Kiss
What you do is, if your partner has a tongue ring and the two of you are French kissing, mess with his/her tongue ring while kissing and it gives your partner chills and excitement/happiness because a lot of people with tongue rings love that. Or if the two of you have a tongue ring have a tongue ring WAR! What you do is keep his/her tongue away from your tongue ring, while you're messing with their tongue ring. (NOTE: don't Tangle tongue rings together because that will be a disaster!)

Do What You Want Kiss
This is always fun. One of you just lies there, and the other does whatever he or she wants to give pleasure. Then, you switch roles. See who can give the most satisfying kiss, with the other not participating at all.

Trade-Off Kiss
One of you gets a cinnamon candy and the other a mint. One takes the cinnamon and the other the mint. While French kissing switch them from time to time.

Who Lasts Longer Kiss
Sit very close to each other, your lips almost touching, arms where you please. Sit like this, very close, and see who can go the longest without kissing the other. It's great fun because you can lose on purpose and still win!

Spiderman Kiss
It's just like in the movie. You kiss upside down, taking in both of your lower lips and do all those other kisses listed above.

Spitzer Kiss
What you do is when you are ready to kiss (or even while you're Frenching or doing any other kiss) is gently nibble and/or lick the parts just above or below your partner's lip. Now don't slobber all over your partner. Just give enough saliva to get them damp. This is very fun and romantic. It will also turn your partner on or in other words make them like the kiss more.

Steam Kiss
You or your partner drink a very hot drink while the other drinks a very icy cold one and see if there's some steam. It's fun because if it doesn't work, just keep trying!

Lap Kiss
While your partner is laying with his/her head in your lap, lean over and kiss her/him. Your bottom lip will be on your partner's top lip, and vise versa. You can even French kiss while in this position. This kiss is a playful kiss, and it can lead to much more.

Carmex Kiss
If either you or your partner are not carmex junkies, apply a little carmex to your lips and feel the gentle tingle on your lips.

Muzzle Kiss
When kissing the neck of your partner, at one point blow air out of your mouth while pressing the lips down, creating the sound of some sort of... flatulence.! It should be ever so unexpected and quite interesting indeed.

Dive Gear Kiss
While diving in a pool, one person wears a diving mask and the other person has to close their eyes and hold on to the mask-wearing person really close. Then trade the inhaling part of the dive gear. Take a deep breath and take the inhaler part away. Kiss the person wherever or however you like, then switch places. This should only be done with some one you truly trust would not hurt you.

Stupid Criminal of The Day

Over the years, I have created numerous back-ups files from the various computers that I have either owned or used. Whenever I get a new computer, they all get put into one file named "Unsorted." Everynow and again, I will attempt to slowly sort through this rather large file and organize the many documents that I have found inside. Today, I came across an old file that I found full of stupid criminal acts that I have collected over the years. So I've decided that my daily post will be stupid criminal acts.


Today's Criminal:

David Posman, 33, was arrested in Providence, Rhode Island, after knocking out an armored car driver and stealing four bags of money. Each bag contained $800 dollars. However, the bags weighed thirty pounds each since they all contained PENNIES. The hefty bags slowed the fleeting Posman to a sluggish stagger. Police easily ran down and arrested the suspect.

The Bad Example Guild

Haven't updated recently, I've been re-reading the Harry Potter books, and playing an online game called Deloria. Basically, you kill monsters, gain levels, and talk to people from around the world. In other words, a chat room where you can actually see what you're doing. One part of the game is that you can create a guild and recruite people into it. So I've created the Bad Example guild, and have labored to set the Bad Example. The guild is small, but its a lot of fun that way. If you've got a free moment, download the game and check it out, its free to play. Any B.E. family members who decide to play, just contact me in the game, you're more than welcome to be apart of the B.E. guild.